Date 2 – Putt Putt and Parenting

Date night number two was one of delicious food and some friendly competition.  A quick stop to the “Frankenmuth Funtown Chowdown Food Truck Festival”, for some dinner and maybe a little dessert.  We highly recommend 3 Lil Pig’s BBQ for their Sundae Cones (think mac n’ cheese, pulled pork, and BBQ sauce in a savory waffle cone!) and Bad Wolf BBQ and their Brisket Nachos. Also, the mini donuts and Wacki Shack are to die for!

With our bellies full, we headed over to the putt putt golf course for 18 holes of extremely competitive play. The winner took all, or in our case, the winner got to pick where we would finish the night at.  Well, though I played to my highest skill level, the game ended in a deadlock (and somehow, we missed two holes…). We took the tie and headed to finish the night with a drink on Tiffany’s patio.

While we were sitting their Evan and I got to talking about the night.  I began to recall the people that we bumped into. Almost every single person was shocked to see us out WITHOUT OUT BABY.  It was as if it was shocking to them to see that Calvin’s mom and dad had…*gasp*…left him at home with a babysitter. I began to realize that we would barely walk more than 10 feet before another person would say to us:

“Where’s the baby?”

“Did you forget someone?”

“Calvin didn’t want to come?”

“Did you leave Calvin at home?”

It wasn’t until we were driving home that this thought came to me:

People think that parents are synonymous with their children.  We couldn’t go out on a simple date night without being questioned as to where our child was.  People looked at us as if we were missing an arm or a leg.  Some where actually concerned that we didn’t have him with us, as if we couldn’t exist without him in our presence.

I know their intentions were genuine, but it also wasn’t as if we just left him to watch the dogs by himself…. 

“Bye Calvin, make sure you crawl over, open the door, then let the dogs out.  We will be home by 11.  You can just put yourself in your crib and go to bed, right?”

As a new mother, I was always concerned that I would lose myself when I had Calvin. That motherhood or parenthood would consume who I was.  I wouldn’t have time to see my friends, my hobbies and volunteering would no longer happen.  The “old” Olivia would cease to exist.  All of these things constantly ran through my head, even after Calvin was born.  However, once we had our lives in order with our new roommate, Evan and I made a conscious decision to include our son in our lives, rather than merge ours with his. We want Calvin to be independent and have an existence all his own, likewise, Evan and I still strive to have our individual lives, our marriage, but also our family.  We decided that it was OK to still have all of those things separately. This is precisely why we took on this 52 Date Night challenge. We wanted to knowingly commit to spending time on each part of our lives – our personal development, our family life, and in this instance our relationship as a husband and wife.

Evan and I love being parents and include Calvin in as many things as we can, but date night just isn’t going to always include out kiddo. Calvin gets to go spend valuable time with Grammy or ChaCha and Evan and I get to spend quality time with each other.  We get to work on our relationship and our marriage to make our family, as a whole, stronger. Calvin is going to grow up spending Thursday nights with his grandparents and build those memories. He is going to see his parents growing and working on their commitment to each other, providing him with an example of what we believe marriage to be.

We can’t wait to share the next two dates that we have planned! We will be coming to you straight from Orlando, Florida.  We won’t be on the strict Thursday date for date number 3.  Don’t you worry though, Calvin will be joining us soon on “date day” number 4, so he can experience some of the fun things that we have been up to.  After that we will be back to our regularly scheduled date nights, where Evan and I are creating time for ourselves and relieve ourselves of “Calvin duty” for a few hours!

See you in Florida! 

XOXO – Olivia

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